Spiritual leadership in dating relationships
Students often ask me and my husband, Shawn, to walk them through premarital counseling or mentoring as part of a program offered at our university. Not all of the couples are engaged; some are merely contemplating marriage. Wherever the work of God has gone forward, it has always had a leader at the helm.“You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave--just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Jesus did not criticize a person’s desire for leadership, he simply defined the path to that leadership. After washing the disciples feet he concludes with this poignant lesson on leadership; “Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. The silver thread running through everything we do is that of servant-leadership.I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.” (John ) The essence of spiritual leadership is following Jesus and serving people. Leadership that does not involve servanthood is not spiritual leadership.The work of ministry requires that it be accomplished by spiritual people, utilizing spiritual methods to accomplish God’s objectives.
The adage is true...people don’t care how much we know until they know how much we care. Little wonder that the offices of Christian leaders are “pastor” (shepherd) and “deacon” (servant).Of course, the Pew survey is less scientific than one might hope.But still, assuming that leadership gifts aren't doled out along gender lines, and that many women possess the key traits needed for top-notch leadership, what might this mean for Christian dating and marriage—in which many Christians believe the man should lead?Spiritual leadership is a blending of natural and spiritual qualities utilized for influencing God’s people to accomplish God’s purposes.Even the natural qualities are not self-produced but God-given and therefore reach their highest effectiveness when employed in the service of God and for His glory.