Are we dating yet
On our second date he told me that he feels comfortable with me, “too comfortable”, that he knows he could “go deep” with me, & that it scares the hell out of him. I tried to be really brave & up front (in the interest of "honest, open communication") when I asked him about it- but I DIDN'T come right out & say "do you want me" or "why haven't you kissed me"! I'm not going to ask him AGAIN because we already talked about it (even though I have NO idea what the answer was!!! ) And I swear, when I touch him I feel this electric jolt jump between us; it’s happened before when he’s handed me something & our fingers brush against each other. He may be trying to be respectful and not rush things.He’s shared details of his last relationship, which was extremely unhealthy, and he said he’d like to “do this right”, take it slow, and build this relationship on a solid foundation of honest communication & trust. ), and I don’t want to kill whatever this is by overanalyzing it with him. Tonight he went to the movies with my kids & me- this is the first time I’ve asked HIM out, and the first time he’s met my kids. (OK, I know a “date” with a 6 and 7 year old in attendance isn’t exactly the right time to make a move, but a surreptitious hand-holding wouldn’t have been inappropriate! I’d lean in really close & whisper to him with my lips right next to his ear, and brush my hand against his leg or arm while I was shifting in my seat. I’ve always thought that that kind of spark HAS to be reciprocal or it wouldn’t exist, but now I’m wondering if it’s only me who feels it. It could be because my kids were there, or it could be that he’s just not into me that way! If you initiate and he does not respond, then there is something wrong. From what you've described, this is my best guess...Example being a kiss doesn't always lead to making out or sex and that you two will both need to take it one step at a time and continue self control. He will need the basic boundries set but also as I've mentioned, reassurance on what he is doing right and what you like but as open to him about what you don't like or don't want still considering his feelings. I just found this group and I’m hoping you can help me out. We’re extremely compatible mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. We talked about it when we were out last week, and he said he’s attracted to me, he thinks I’m amazing, etc. I obviously failed in meeting my objective, because I still feel like I’m in limbo. Instead of wondering what things are, just ask for the kiss and see what he does. When we go out we talk for HOURS, about everything. So I keep wondering if maybe this is just a “friend” thing.He calls me every day & I feel pretty sure he’s into me. (In which case I made a COMPLETE idiot of myself tonight!!! Oh yeah- some other things he's said- on the 2nd date (the "go deep" conversation), he said "Don't be using any of your feminine wiles on me or I'm a goner! Yes, he definitely feels the "spark," but for some reason he's trying to resist it.
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This then would I suppose cause the fear that a kiss may open the floodgates to everything and anything. what you perceive to be interest may be misread signs....
In this situation when you kiss him (as that seems the procedure in this case) tell him what you expect. and i've come to the conclusion i dont read the signs very well.......